by Rita Bates.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
RJ Bates is currently working through the Creative and Critical Writing MA. She is a morning person, conscious about eating foods that will fuel her body and mind, but will never give up drinking red wine. She enjoys a challenge, mental or physical and loves people-watching, because sometimes if lucky enough, she witnesses random acts that would otherwise go unnoticed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The Fulfilment of a Promise<\/u><\/p>\n\n\n\n
I loved spending time with Ashanti.\nShe was double my height and captain of the volleyball team. She was always saying\nher younger brother, a year below me in school, was a constant pest. She hated\nbeing the older sibling, like me, having to lead by example and look after him,\nas though she were his mother. She warned me about new tasks to watch out for.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u2018What kind of tasks?\u2019 I asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u2018Hey turds! Slow down! And stay on\nthe sidewalk!\u2019 she yelled at our siblings. \u2018The kind our mothers don\u2019t want\nanymore, like walking them to school and back.\u2019 She pointed at Ian, Emily, and\nOwen. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u2018She\u2019s not my real mom, and my dad\nsaid that walking Emily and Owen to school is a reward for behaving and\nfollowing instructions.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u2018HA!\u2019 Ashanti opened her bag and\nhanded me a caramel. \u2018Listen up runt.\u2019 <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Runt was Ashanti\u2019s nickname for me.\nMy dad called me Little Bird. People were always pointing out that I\u2019m small\ncompared to other kids my age. I didn\u2019t mind being Ashanti\u2019s runt. She let me\ncome around at recess and sit with her friends. Most of the time I just pulled\nout my book to read, not really knowing what they were talking about, which\nmostly included boys. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u2018Eye contact, over here.\u2019 She bent\nher head down in front of mine. \u2018Lily, you\ncan\u2019t always have your head in a book.\u2019 <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I was flipping through the pages, counting\nthe chapters, as we walked. I liked setting goals. I could read at least three\nchapters every day if they weren\u2019t too long, and more on the weekends. This\nbook had twenty-four chapters. I would finish it in a week.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
She grabbed hold of my shoulders\nand shook me. \u2018Books are important, but so are other things.\u2019 She tossed my mop\nof curls. I heard the static shock as she pulled her hand away from the top of\nmy head. I imagined my hair standing as high as Ashanti. \u2018You\u2019re not going to\ngrow any taller if you don\u2019t get some exercise, fresh air and sunshine. You\ndon\u2019t get that sitting inside, reading.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u2018I\u2019ll spend more time outside. I promise.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u2018You\u2019d better!\u2019 Ashanti smiled down\nat me. I smiled back. \u2018So, what are you reading right now?\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u2018The Sword in The Stone<\/em>,\u2019 I\nsaid.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018T.H. White. Good one.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n I slipped my key in to the\napartment door and pushed it open slightly, then waited. There was no sign of Mother.\nEmily and Owen were giggling and pulling at something inside my backpack. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018Cut it out,\u2019 I said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018I just want to see what you signed\nout of the library this week,\u2019 Emily said. Owen was still giggling. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018You could ask,\u2019 I replied,\nswinging the bag off my back. \u2018What are you waiting for? Get inside.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018Don\u2019t talk to us that way,\u2019 Emily\nsaid and pushed her way past me, nearly knocking me over, holding Owen\u2019s hand\nto be sure he followed her and not me. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018Emily,\u2019 I called out, \u2018Daddy said\nI\u2019m in charge, remember?\u2019 But Emily wasn\u2019t listening. She dropped her bag with\na thud, removed her sneakers, and turned to face me, sticking her tongue out.\nOwen was still giggling. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018Sit and watch TV, until I make us\na snack.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n Owen immediately obeyed, since we\nrarely got to watch the only television in the apartment. Mother, that\u2019s what\nshe made me call her, allowed us to watch television before school and weekend\nmornings, but that was it. Occasionally, Dad would let us sit with him if Mother\nwas out. She believed television would turn our minds to mush, but not hers.\nShe watched the television every chance she got. <\/p>\n\n\n\n I hurried to the bedroom we shared,\ncarrying all our stuff, and placed the backpacks in the closet. Mother hated\nclutter. I was running back down the hall with the lunch pails when I heard a\nloud crash, a pause, followed by Emily screaming and Owen crying. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018What happened?\u2019 I ran the short\ndistance to the kitchen.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018Owen wanted the last pop. I told\nhim to put it back, but he didn\u2019t listen,\u2019 Emily managed to spit out between\nsobs. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018Liar, Liar,\u2019 Owen yelled, \u2018you\nwere going to drink it and not share. You poured it all in your glass.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018Stop it, both of you. It doesn\u2019t\nmatter now.\u2019 <\/p>\n\n\n\n I dropped the lunch pails on the\nkitchen table. The floor was covered with shards of glass. Brown liquid was\nspread across the kitchen, including the walls and cabinets. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018Don\u2019t move,\u2019 I said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I rushed to grab the broom and\ndustpan. I noticed while sweeping that the bottoms of both Emily and Owen\u2019s\npants were spotted and stained. I worked quickly, but I wasn\u2019t quick enough. I\nheard the door to the apartment open.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Mother walked into the kitchen and\nstarted yelling and shaking her fists. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018This is your fault,\u2019 she said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Emily and Owen were crying again. I\ninstinctively dropped the broom. Mother\u2019s eyes were wild. She lurched forward\nto grab hold of my shirt. I made for the dining table. We ran circles around\nit. I was becoming faster, training with the other kids at school for\ncross-country and track and field, but if I was going to escape, I only had one\noption. I ran through the kitchen hoping she wouldn\u2019t follow. I swung the\napartment door open and ran past the elevator, to the stairway. I jumped down\nthe steps two and three at a time until I reached the bottom, never looking\nback. I didn\u2019t stop until I reached the library, five city blocks from home. <\/p>\n\n\n\n I collapsed behind the building and\nplaced my head between my knees. My lungs were stinging as I gasped for air. It\nwas then I noticed my blood-soaked socks. I felt nauseated. Saliva filled my\nthroat. I tried to swallow but couldn\u2019t. I was still trying to catch my breath.\nI tried breathing through my nose deeply with my eyes closed. I placed my hands\nover my chest. My heart banged against my palms.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It wasn\u2019t my fault, but she\nwouldn\u2019t want to hear my excuses. I was responsible for Emily and Owen when she\nand Dad weren\u2019t around. It was my job to look after them and keep them happy\nand safe. I had failed. I was still breathing hard but that became secondary to\nthe throbbing in my feet. My face was hot and wet.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018Are you okay?\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n I looked up. Standing above me was\na woman older than Mother. She smelled of tobacco, her habit confirmed by the\ncigarette package in one hand and a matchbook in the other. I recognized her as\none of the librarians. Her hair was pixie short with wisps that framed her face\nand her glasses dangled from a chain around her neck.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018Are you okay?\u2019 I heard her ask\nagain. She knelt down in front of me, noticing for the first time that I had no\nshoes, my socks were bloodied, and shards of glass clung to the cotton fabric\nalong the soles of my feet. She gasped. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018Where are your shoes?\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n I couldn\u2019t speak. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018Can you tell me your name?\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n But I didn\u2019t answer. <\/p>\n\n\n\n My breathing returned to normal,\nbut my throat stung like I\u2019d been clawed by a cat and my heart beat like a drum\nroll, reverberating in my ears. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018Don\u2019t move. I\u2019ll be right back!\u2019\nShe dashed off in the direction of the staff entrance. When she returned, she\nwas with another woman. They hoisted me up by lifting under my arms.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018Don\u2019t put your feet down,\u2019 she\ninstructed, \u2018we\u2019ll carry you in, so not to push the glass further into the\nbottom of your feet.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n I nodded my understanding, but\nstill said nothing. My legs ached and the throbbing in my feet was much more\nintense when I was upright. I had to concentrate to keep my feet off the\nground. Inside the library they took me into the staff room, an area of the\nlibrary I\u2019d never been before. They set me down on one of the couches.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018Put your feet up here.\u2019 The woman\npointed to the coffee table in front of the couch. I hesitated. Mother would\nnever allow us to place our feet on top of furniture. \u2018It\u2019s okay. We have to\ntake a look at your injuries.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n How was I going to explain what\nhappened? I couldn\u2019t tell her the truth. Why had I run to the library in the\nfirst place?<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018Lily, is that you?\u2019 At the mention\nof my name, I looked over. It was Ms. Kennedy, the librarian from the\nchildren\u2019s department. \u2018Lily, what happened?\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018I\u2026I\u2026\u2019 I wasn\u2019t sure what to say.\nThe truth wasn\u2019t an option. That would get me into more trouble at home. I took\na deep breath, wiped the tears from my face. I didn\u2019t like lying but I had\nbecome good at it. \u2018I was on my way home from school and I took a shortcut\nthrough the park.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018By yourself?\u2019 Ms. Kennedy asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018Yes.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018You know it\u2019s dangerous to go\nthrough that park alone in this neighbourhood, even during the day.\u2019 Her gaze\nsoftened. My lips trembled. She placed a reassuring hand on my knee. \u2018Go on.\u2019 <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018A boy was hiding behind the slide.\nI didn\u2019t see him until it was too late. I tried to outrun him but he caught up\nto me. He wanted my shoes. He said they would look good on his sister. I took\nthem off and threw them as far as I could, and then I ran here. I wasn\u2019t\nwatching where I was running, and I must have stepped on a broken bottle. I\njust wanted to get away.\u2019 A partial truth. <\/p>\n\n\n\n The woman with the pixie cut returned\nto the staff room carrying a box. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018Lily, you know better than to\ncross through that park without your parents or another adult, even if it is a\nshortcut. Promise me you won\u2019t to do it again.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018I promise, Ms. Kennedy.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018Which of your parents can we call?\u2019\nShe asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018No, please don\u2019t!\u2019 I was nearly\nyelling, my voice sounding husky. \u2018My parents are at work and\u2026\u2019 I could feel my\nheart thumping. I had to think quickly. \u2018I already called my dad from the phone\nbooth at the corner.\u2019 <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018And\u2026what\ndid he say?\u2019 Ms. Kennedy asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \n\u2018He said to come here. I told him I was okay. He said he would get me\nafter he finished work.\u2019 Why had I said that Dad would come? What if they made\nme stay here, in this room, until he came, which he wouldn\u2019t because I lied about calling him? \u2018I\u2019m\nfine, really.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ms. Kennedy frowned, but nodded to\nthe security guard, so he left. She took the box from the other woman and\nopened it. \u2018Let\u2019s see how bad the cuts on your feet are.\u2019 She winced as she\nprepared to remove my sock. \u2018This is going to hurt I\u2019m afraid.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n She slowly removed each sock. I\nwanted to scream, but I didn\u2019t. Instead I gripped the sofa cushions on either\nside of me, and bit down on my lower lip. It took Ms. Kennedy almost an hour to\nremove all the shards of glass and tiny stones from the bottom of my feet,\nusing tweezers. Thankfully, none of them were deep enough that I needed\nstitches. She disinfected the wounds and wrapped my feet in gauze. Once she was\ndone, she opened the fridge door and handed me half a sandwich. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018I can\u2019t let you go until we\u2019ve\nfilled in an incident report. I\u2019ll be right back.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n I gratefully took the sandwich. I\nhadn\u2019t gotten as far as a snack before I had to run for my life, and I was\nstarving. I swallowed it, my stomach still grumbling, wanting more.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ms. Kennedy returned with a\nclipboard and a pair of socks in one hand and pink, high cut sneakers in the\nother. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018These should fit you,\u2019 she handed\nthem to me. \u2018They\u2019ve been in the lost and found for months, unclaimed. Now they\nbelong to you.\u2019 She smiled. \u2018Let\u2019s finish with this incident report so you can\nget home.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n My feet no longer throbbed. My\nhunger forgotten. I answered all of Ms. Kennedy\u2019s questions as I slipped on my\nnew shoes. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018When do think your Father will be\nhere, Lily?\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018Soon.\u2019 I had to figure out how to\nescape, and not get myself into any more trouble. \u2018Can I wait for him in the\nlibrary?\u2019 I asked. \u2018I\u2019d like to pick out some books before my dad gets here.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018It will hurt when you walk.\u2019 She\nlooked me over. \u2018Okay, but sit if your feet hurt.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018Thank you,\u2019 I said, standing up,\ngritting my teeth and bracing for impact as I prepared to experience the pain\nof blood rushing to my toes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I got up from the couch and hobbled out of the\nstaff room walking on the heels of my feet. I spent the next twenty minutes pretending\nto look for books, maneuvering the aisles, slinking my way to the bookshelves\nclosest to the main entrance. I pulled a book from the shelf and opened it. I\npretended to be reading, but I was really looking to see who was near the\ncirculation desk. I didn\u2019t want Ms. Kennedy to see me leaving alone. There was\na lineup of people checking their books out, and a crowd around the librarian\u2019s\ndesk. I shoved the book I had back into its place and slipped in stride\nalongside an elderly couple leaving the building. <\/p>\n\n\n\n I vaguely remember the pain of\nwalking home. I couldn\u2019t take my eyes off the pink, high cuts that now belonged\nto me. When I got to the apartment, the door was unlocked. I peaked in before\nentering. Mother was in the kitchen. I removed my new shoes in the corridor\noutside the apartment, checking the soles of my feet to be sure I didn\u2019t leave\na bloody trail leading to the bedroom. Emily was sitting on her bed playing\nwith her doll.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018Where did you go?\u2019 she asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018The library.\u2019 <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018Hey, where did you get those?\u2019 she\nwas pointing to my pink shoes. \u2018Did you steal them?\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018No! I didn\u2019t steal them. I got\nthem from the lost and found at the library.\u2019 I placed the shoes under my bed. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018But you didn\u2019t lose them. They\ndon\u2019t belong to you.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018Ms. Kennedy gave me permission to\nhave them. They\u2019re mine now.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n Owen ran in announcing dinner.\nEmily jumped off her bed and skipped out of the room. I slithered slowly and silently\ndown the hall. Emily and Mother were laughing at something Owen said. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Mother never stayed angry long. Her\nmoods altered like a crisp wind changing direction between buildings. One\nminute she was spewing terrible words and swinging her fists, locking me in my\nroom, the next she was crying, or laughing. I never got the crying part,\nbecause it should\u2019ve been me crying, not her, since I was the one being\nterrorized. <\/p>\n\n\n\n I sat in my chair at the dinner\ntable. I listened to Mother ask Emily and Owen about their day. When dinner was\nfinished, she told me to clean the dishes and cover Daddy\u2019s dinner. He wouldn\u2019t\nbe home until much later. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Dishes put away, I headed for the\nbedroom. I passed Emily, Owen, and Mother snuggled on the sofa, reading. I\npulled out my homework and sat on my bed. I wished Daddy was home so I could\nhave someone to share my day with, too. Instead, I would have to wait until\nmorning when I could tell Ashanti I\u2019d done what I\u2019d promised and got some exercise\nand fresh air. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"featured_media":0,"template":"","categories":[398],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5347","project","type-project","status-publish","hentry","category-student-stories"],"acf":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/uniofglos.blog\/creativewriting\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/project\/5347","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/uniofglos.blog\/creativewriting\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/project"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/uniofglos.blog\/creativewriting\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/project"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/uniofglos.blog\/creativewriting\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5347"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/uniofglos.blog\/creativewriting\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5347"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/uniofglos.blog\/creativewriting\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5347"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}