{"id":5364,"date":"2019-05-21T13:34:49","date_gmt":"2019-05-21T12:34:49","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/uniofglos.blog\/creativewriting\/?post_type=project&#038;p=5364"},"modified":"2019-07-31T10:18:10","modified_gmt":"2019-07-31T09:18:10","slug":"the-devil-that-taught-me-i-couldnt-be-loved","status":"publish","type":"project","link":"https:\/\/uniofglos.blog\/creativewriting\/project\/the-devil-that-taught-me-i-couldnt-be-loved\/","title":{"rendered":"The Devil That Taught Me I Couldn&#8217;t Be Loved"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>by Bethan Manley.<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: 'Arial',sans-serif;\"><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">Bethan is an English Language and Creative Writing student. She is also a poet with a background in slam poetry and prose. She is a singer-song-writer turned poet so her poems tend to flow and be heartfelt. If she&#8217;s not writing you can normally find Bethan anywhere with dogs! This is a prose piece adapted from one of her poems, and suitable for slam prose performance.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n<p>There are nights when I still can\u2019t sleep\u2014still haunted by your touch, your eyes, and the mouth that taught me that I couldn\u2019t be loved. Shouldn\u2019t be loved. Beloved<\/p>\n<p>Now I am a fortress with walls high enough to stop people getting in. You are not who I thought you were. I am not who I thought I was. Trying to figure out truth from lie.<\/p>\n<p><em>I still can\u2019t.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>I just know you were lying when you said you loved me, when you said forever, but\u2026<\/p>\n<p><em>I am okay<\/em><\/p>\n<p>I dance with ghosts, memories of things, until the early hours. Memories of things. I wish I could change. Taunted by the devil that lurks in your smile, holding his hand, walking into hell, and burning my body trying to make you love me.<\/p>\n<p><em>I still have the scars<\/em><\/p>\n<p>I lost my halo trying to save you.<\/p>\n<p>Maybe I am the fallen angel?<\/p>\n<p>Maybe I am my own devil?<\/p>\n<p>Maybe I only have myself to blame?<\/p>\n<p><em>Maybe <\/em><\/p>\n<p>I tried to love you so deeply, but you weren\u2019t ready. You took my love for naivety, and I don\u2019t blame you.<\/p>\n<p><em>I wish I could. I\u2019m tired of blaming myself.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>My mother has spent nights convincing me that it\u2019s not my fault.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cA devil is still a devil, whether an angel loves him or not.\u201d<\/p>\n<p><em>I stopped loving you, but the devil still lurks in your smile.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"featured_media":0,"template":"","categories":[398],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5364","project","type-project","status-publish","hentry","category-student-stories"],"acf":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/uniofglos.blog\/creativewriting\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/project\/5364","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/uniofglos.blog\/creativewriting\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/project"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/uniofglos.blog\/creativewriting\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/project"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/uniofglos.blog\/creativewriting\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5364"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/uniofglos.blog\/creativewriting\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5364"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/uniofglos.blog\/creativewriting\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5364"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}